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memories
Ultra rare 1874 Sharps Creedmore target rifle
in completely original condition.
Well.......damn. As many of you already know, we recently lost Julie to her long battle with breast cancer. For me, being retired and seriously limited in my physical abilities since my $400,000.00 back surgery, I've quietly devoted myself to being there for her....moving in and being at her side almost perpetually to provide any and all assistance these last few months.

Most recently, the last few weeks hadn't been very pretty as the end was getting near. As much as I've been her friend and loved her dearly for years....... I can now share that in recent months, she wouldn't admit it, but she was in a lot of pain and getting worse, so when the end arrived.........I was exhausted. On a positive note, in the end, she was ready to go and though heavily sedated....... left us peacefully, holding my hand and for that, I'm glad I could be there and provide that small amount of comfortin her final moments.

We will all miss her. 
We all used to be a lot younger!
The one really dark part of all this is for me. Julie was the very last of all my local personal friends including horse people and band members.

They all got old........and died.
I just got a really sweet email...that I'd like to share....from Kathy; laughing and reminding me that she (Kathy) once saved my ass as she had to remind me of just how naive I was and how important it would be.....that if I  ever found and settled in with a serious girlfriend (I was totally un-attached at the time), it would be critically important that I never allow any girlfriend to ever meet Julie because the gf would never beieve or trust me, much less accept.... that Julie and I were never anything other than long-time riding buddies and even longer-time personal friends and I could honestly say for the rest of time.....that Julie and I never slept together.  Even more, Julie and I never dated or even went out except for one time in about 2005 (we'd already known each other for years) when we both had thoughts that for all the time we spent together and always had fun and all the stuff we had in common...... that we'd come to wonder with all our time together, if maybe we should try a real date....that we get ourselves all fixed up and head out for some time together with romantic overtomes.... what a mess! The date wasn't even over when we had to agree..... that our date felt like we were tofgether....holding hands....occasionallty kissing.....a sibling (YUK BLA PUKE!)........and if I would ever introduce Julie to a potential gf, once said potential gf would meet Julie and see us together, would completely freaK out and never believe that Julie and I were never anything other than old friends and riding buddies.

So for the last 25 years, Julie and I kept our friendship a secret....from everyone except a few women in the Saddle Club who had known us for a long time and knew our situation... and were very vocal that no potential girlfriend of mine would ever believe (much less accept) that my relationship with Julie was ever anything other than purely platonic. One night.....around a campfire, said women sat us down and insisted just how important it was that we.....and everyone who knew us..... would keep our secret! Much to my surprise, nobody ever spilled the beans!

So now, everone knows the whole story.